


Can't be unlearned

by rainbow_nerds



Category: Captain America (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Bottom Bucky Barnes, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Every version of Steve loves every version of Bucky, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Post-Captain America: The Winter Soldier, Second Chances, Top Steve Rogers, you get it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-22
Updated: 2021-01-22
Packaged: 2021-03-13 16:09:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,247
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28906149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbow_nerds/pseuds/rainbow_nerds
Summary: “Steve,” Bucky started, voice small. Steve looked up and saw something else in Bucky’s eyes. Was it hope?“Yeah, Buck?”“Did we ever... Before the war, did I ever kiss you? Or is that just a dream I had?” Steve blushed.“It happened. We kissed, and we… We kissed.” He didn’t want to push anything, so he left it open.“Can I... Would you mind if I kissed you again?”
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers
Comments: 30
Kudos: 188





	Can't be unlearned

**Author's Note:**

> So I was practicing figure drawing and poses, and this happened.  
> Enjoy?  
> (Title is from It Will Come Back by Hozier)

Steve sat with his arms folded on his living room floor, clothes scattered around the room.. Bucky was in the bathroom, had been ever since — well. Steve tilted his head back to rest against the wall, imagining Bucky there on the other side. Perhaps he was in a similar position.

He hoped he was alright.

Steve closed his eyes and let the events of the evening wash over him.

It had started as just a normal night, they had gone out for a drink, had a laugh, talked shit for a while. But then Steve had glanced up and there was something in Bucky’s gaze that made his breath catch. Something he hadn’t seen since, well.

Since before the war.

Steve’s breath had caught and he’d allowed himself — just this once — to let his gaze drop to Bucky’s mouth, tongue sneaking out traitorously to lick his own lips, desperate to kiss Bucky again after all these years.

But no, he couldn’t. Bucky didn’t remember _that_. Or maybe he just didn’t _want_ that anymore.

Either way, Steve was just happy to have Bucky in any way he could.

“Steve,” Bucky started, voice small. Steve looked up and saw something else in Bucky’s eyes. Was it hope?

“Yeah, Buck?”

“Did we ever... Before the war, did I ever kiss you? Or is that just a dream I had?” Steve blushed.

“It happened. We kissed, and we… We kissed.” He didn’t want to push anything, so he left it open.

“Can I... Would you mind if I kissed you again?” Bucky sounded nervous, and Steve’s heart broke at the fact that Bucky didn’t know. Didn’t know that when it came to him, Steve would always want whatever Bucky was willing to give. He nodded, voice lost.

Bucky leaned in slowly, and when their lips met it sent a spark through Steve which ignited his blood and made him wish they weren’t out in public.

Bucky pulled away first, eyes wide and mouth hanging slightly open. He looked surprised, but there was no fear, no regret in his face. In fact—

“I think we should go home, Stevie.” His voice was rough, and Steve could once again do nothing but nod, standing and dumping some notes on the table before grabbing his coat and Bucky’s hand and racing out of the bar.

They had barely made it home, and no sooner had they made it in the door than their clothing was flying everywhere and Steve was pressing Bucky against the wall.

“I remember this. You were smaller. I remember wanting…”

“What did you want, Buck?”

“I wanted you to pick me up. You never could.” Steve had smirked at that.

“I could, now.” Bucky had grinned and jumped up to wrap his legs around Steve’s waist. So trusting, and Steve would never drop him.

After, when they had been laying on the floor, Steve had rolled over to find Bucky still hard.

“Looks like you’ve got that aftereffect too, huh?” He’d smirked, and positioned himself between Bucky’s legs. Bucky sat up, leaning back on his hand with one knee elevated. He was looking down at Steve, who braced himself with one hand clenching Bucky’s thigh. He wasted no time getting Bucky’s dick in his mouth.

He started with just the tip, suckling on it gently but then he sunk down, taking Bucky as deep as he could just to feel the burn in the back of his throat. Bucky had released a punched out moan, throwing his head back in pleasure.

Steve relived that moment now. The sounds Bucky had made, the way his metal hand had come up to fist in Steve’s hair. The taste of him, familiar and new all at once. The way he had spilled down Steve’s throat and then pulled him up for a kiss as soon as he’d come up for air.

Then Bucky had gone into the bathroom, and Steve hadn’t seen him since.

He knew it had probably been a lot for Bucky, all at once.. They probably should have taken it slower, not gotten so carried away. Bucky had made so much progress lately, after all. Steve hoped this wouldn’t be the thing to send him into a spiral.

They’d talk it out. They’d gotten good at that. They’d talk and they’d figure things out together.

For now, though, it was clear Bucky needed a little time to think. Steve would allow him that.

He sighed and pushed himself away from the wall. He should probably get dressed, maybe make some food.

He was hungry from all their activity after all, and he was sure Bucky would be, too.

✨✨✨

Bucky sat with his back to the bathroom wall. The tiles warmed to match his body and if he closed his eyes he could pretend that maybe Steve was there.

Steve.

Images flashed in his mind like a film, skipping and jumping but never stopping.

Steve, with his mouth attached to Bucky’s throat like a limpet, holding him up so easily, so effortlessly.

Bucky’s back was to the wall in his mind, too, but his arms were wrapped tight around Steve’s shoulders, head thrown back in ecstasy as Steve held him in place, jerking him off slowly to the rhythm of his thrusts.

It was pure sensation, and Bucky revelled in it. When Steve fucked him, he didn’t have time to think, to get in his head. If his mind began to stray to the past, Steve’s next thrust would align perfectly and drag him back to the here and now. When he came, he felt more alive — more human than he had in years.

A few more thrusts and Steve was spilling inside him, and Bucky’s brain came back online just in time to grind his hips down, drawing that blissed out moan from Steve’s lips before they stilled and Steve lowered them both gently to the ground.

But that hadn’t been the end of it, not even remotely. The movie continued to play in his mind as he sat there, alone and yet not alone.

Because Steve was still there, just outside the room. He heard him stand and move around the apartment.

Bucky knew he was different to the man Steve had known before. That Bucky had been suave and flirtatious, had been unscarred and unfragmented, and Steve had loved him, then. Could he love Bucky as he was now, or was he just chasing what they had had before?

But the Steve in his own memories was a different Steve, too — smaller and more fragile, but not weaker. That Steve had sat astride Bucky and rode him until he forgot his own name. He bit Bucky’s clavicle and made him scream into his arm for fear someone would overhear them.

This Steve was different. This Steve was gentler, softer around the edges, and carried so much more weight on his broader shoulders.

Maybe this new Steve wasn’t looking for the old Bucky, after all.

Maybe all they had survived apart had reforged them for each other.

Bucky smiled, his back against the wall, and then pushed himself away, standing up and walking to the door.

He walked out and into the kitchen, where Steve stood in front of the stove wearing a pair of boxer shorts. Bucky approached him, deliberately making his footsteps audible. He wrapped his arms around Steve and pressed a kiss to the back of his neck.

“Everything okay, Buck?” He asked.

“Yeah. Everything’s great.”


End file.
